Stoic Self-Discipline Guide: Becoming the Person You Intend to Be

“First say to yourself, what manner of man you want to be; when you have settled this, act upon it in all you do.”

Epictetus, Discourses, Book 3, Chapter 23.1

We spend so much of our lives trying to do more. Accomplish more. Achieve more. But the Stoics invite us to slow down and ask a more fundamental question: Who am I trying to become?

This quote from Epictetus is more than ancient advice; it is a modern lifeline. It challenges us to clarify who we want to be before we take action. That is the foundation of any true Stoic self-discipline guide. Without self-awareness, even our most productive days may pull us further from ourselves.

Stoic discipline is not about forcing yourself into rigid routines or chasing perfection. It is about aligning your actions with your deeper values. You define the kind of person you want to be, and then you act like it, moment to moment.

This kind of integrity is what Stoicism is all about: the harmony between what we say we believe and how we show up in the world.

How to Live by a Stoic Self-Discipline Guide

1. Decide who you want to be
Write it down. Not just what you want to achieve, but who you want to become. Are you aiming to be more honest? More courageous? More grateful? Your actions begin with this vision.

2. Align your actions with that vision
You don’t need to be perfect. Just consistent. Before each decision, ask yourself: Does this reflect the person I’ve chosen to be?

3. Review daily, gently
At the end of the day, reflect without judgment. Where did you live your values? Where did you drift? That awareness, practiced regularly, builds character.

Discipline is not a punishment; it’s a path. This guide is not about becoming someone else. It’s about becoming who you said you were going to be.

Want to explore more Stoic strategies?

Book a free consultation with one of our Stoic Coaches or read more on the Epictetus Quotes page. Or listen to the Via Stoica Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcast, or watch it on YouTube.

Author Bio

Benny Voncken is the co-founder of Via Stoica, where he helps people apply Stoic philosophy to modern life. He is a Stoic coach, writer, and podcast host of The Via Stoica Podcast. With almost a decade of teaching experience and daily Stoic practice, Benny creates resources, workshops, and reflections that make ancient wisdom practical today.