What is Admiration: A False Promise to Happiness

Those Who Wish To Be Admired

Epictetus, Discourse Book 1.21

What is admiration? Should it be something to strive for, or is it a false promise of happiness? In this summary of discourse 1.21 by Epictetus, we will examine this topic that keeps many in its hold. The discourse itself is rather short, but it has a lot of value. Knowing what admiration means to you and how it impacts your life can be a big step to living a better life.

“Admiration: A feeling of respect and approval”

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/admiration

By looking at the definition of admiration, we can then ask the question of where this feeling of respect and approval comes from. Is it an internal force or an external one? Understanding the source is key in Stoicism and in how Epictetus views the philosophy. Admiration is something we receive from others. When we do something they approve of from their point of view. This doesn’t mean that it is a good thing we’ve done, but the person who admires us thinks so. The true admiration we need is the one we have for ourselves.

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Those who wish to be admired

The person who is speaking to Epictetus in this discourse shares that he wants everyone he meets to admire him. Not only that, but to cry out and acknowledge what a great philosopher he is. The approval this person is seeking is coming from external factors. Because he isn’t sure about himself, he needs us to tell him how great he is. How does this compare to how we meet the world? If we go out and expect everyone to admire us and cheer us on, what would that say about us? Are we the secure and confident individuals who can take on the world?

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“Who are these people, by whom you wish to be admired? Are they not the very people whom you have been in the habit of describing as mad? What, then, do you want to be admired by madmen?”

Epictetus, The Discourses, Book 1, chapter 21.4

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Not only do we seek admiration, but we also accept it from anyone. Even the people whose behavior is unvirtuous, or we judge to be madmen. Is their approval meaningful to us, and if it is, what does that say about us? We need to be careful whose admiration we seek and whose we value. Some praise is ridiculous to fight for. In fact, Epictetus goes further than that. He goes on to say that admiration is a fool’s game.

Is all admiration bad?

Is it bad to receive admiration? No, it isn’t bad to receive the respect and approval of others. There’s nothing you can do about them giving it to you. It can work as a sign to let yourself know that you’re on the right path. Especially if it is from people whose opinions you hold in high regard.

It turns bad if it becomes the motivation for our actions. Then we are placing our peace of mind in the hands of others. If we feel worthless without this acknowledgment, then who are we? And what if it is the praise by those who don’t live up to the highest moral standards? That kind of admiration should be seen as a warning. A lesson to change our ways and live more in accordance with nature. This is also where Epictetus takes us in this discourse.

Aligning with Nature

“When a person has his proper station in life, he does not gape after things beyond it.”

Epictetus, The Discourses, Book 1, Chapter 21.1

We don’t have to guess what Epictetus feels about admiration, at least not when seeking it from others. He is quite clear on where our focus should lie. And as long as we know who we are and what our duty is, then there is no need for admiration from others. 

“I for my part am content if my desires and aversions are in accordance with nature, and if I exercise my impulse to act and not to act as I was born to do, and likewise my purpose, design, and assent.”

Epictetus, Book 1, Chapter 21.2

Recurring throughout the discourse, the handbook, and pretty much all of Epictetus’s messaging is the idea of having our desires and aversions aligned with nature. This means to accept whatever fate has in store for us. Besides that, making sure that our impulses and everything else fall in line with who we are. That is all we need to live a good life.

Admiration: A false promise of happiness

Keep in mind what admiration is. It is an opinion or value judgment from someone else on your actions. Not based on who you are as a person, but often made from what you do. When someone tells you that you’ve done something well, that makes you feel good. It is possible for us to then fall into the trap of chasing this praise. This is the moment we give up our freedom and start becoming slaves to the approval of others.

Not all admiration is bad, but we need to be able to see it for what it is. This can only be done from a solid belief in who we are. The better we are aligned with our nature, the better we can identify admiration as a sign that we are going in the right direction.

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Author Bio

Benny Voncken is the co-founder of Via Stoica, where he helps people apply Stoic philosophy to modern life. He is a Stoic coach, writer, and podcast host of The Via Stoica Podcast. With almost a decade of teaching experience and daily Stoic practice, Benny creates resources, workshops, and reflections that make ancient wisdom practical today.